March Update

Okay, I get it.. I suck at updating.. I am sorry.. It isn't like too much has changed for me.. Because really it hasn't.. Other than the Accutane stuff.. everything is really just the same..

Speaking of.. Acctuane sucks.. I am currently in month 3 week 2 and let me tell you, I will certainly be glad when this is over.. Now take into account that I am an unabashed whiner when I don't feel well.

I turn into a grown up whiny ass child.. to top it off, I can't drink for the 5-6 months that I am taking this medication.. Nothing like making a bad time worse..

So side effects.. First month, My hair, face and skin became less oily and looked pretty good.. For a few days, and then I began to get flaky.. I was shedding skin cells everywhere!! I turned red, like a cherry kinda red.. Maraschino to be exact.. and only from my shoulders up.. and everything dried out even further to the point where I was not only losing flakes of skin, but whole areas at a time.. One night I even lost all of the skin on my lower lip all at once! I average about 2 nosebleeds a day.. Makes life interesting.. random nosebleeds after sneezing, blowing my nose.. That's another thing.. I have been using a Neti pot with plain warm water to help the dryness, and then either snorting a very small amount of KY or applying a small amount of Vaseline to a wet q-tip and rubbing that into each nostril.. it helps with the bleeding and keeps the inside of my nose from ripping when I sneeze.. and Yes, I can feel it when it rips and then I have to run for a Kleenex because a massive nosebleed is coming..

Second month,

I go into a panic attack if I cannot find chap stick. I carry about 20 different types/flavors of lip balm at all times. these are in coat pockets, purse, work bag, gym bag, bathroom, bedside table, random window sills and at work. It's odd and probably excessive but I have never before actually finished a tube of chap stick that I can remember.. I have polished off 5 of them already, and I don't use just one at a time..

I broke out as I never have this month, and I was really, really feeling embarrassed about it.. I didn't want to go to class or to work.. Work wasn't so bad as I could hide in my cube all day, but school was intolerable.. I am working on an MBA and I shouldn't look like a damn teenager.. I noticed that it's getting harder to squat and get back up on my own.. I have been doing squats at the gym and when getting/putting away dishes in the kitchen and I have noticed that it's getting progressively harder to do this..

Third Month

I saw my Dermatologist today.. I am flaky, not quite as red and the nosebleeds have stopped for the most part.. I still get blood every time I blow my nose but I can live with that.. What I have been having a problem with is the joint pain in my knees.. I can't squat at all now without having to sit on the floor and finding another way back up. My lower back is really stiff, and going from a lying down or sitting position to standing takes a fair amount of stretching to make it back to upright. I feel like an old lady.. Because of this, Working out has pretty much come to a halt. I am tired all of the time, and I sleep when the kids will let me. I broke out pretty badly this month, oddly after I had a beer at a hockey game. Probably didn't help that I was also under some pretty serious stress from work as well. I mean really bad breakout. I am still flaking at a pretty decent rate, and I have noticed that if I do have a flare up, I will lose the skin around the flare up to 1.5 inches around. Sometimes larger. it comes off in sheets.. It's scary.. I have pretty much stopped wearing makeup except for eyeliner and mascara, everything else is just too irritating.. My hair is very dry, i condition every day but wash it every other.. I'm constantly itchy and am constantly using CeraVe, which is the best stuff on the market.. It makes my skin somewhat tolerable..

I have become extremely photo sensitive, sunlight hurts my skin and eyes, and night driving is awful! The contrast between dark and headlights is almost excruciating!

The Dr. said that all of my side effects are normal and will disappear when I am off of the meds, and he said that we could drop my dosing down, (I'm on 40Mg twice a day) But it could cause my treatment to be longer than 6 months.. I chose to keep the dosing and get off of it in 2 months rather in 3-4.. He also said that this last breakout coulod be the last one that I ever have.. GOD I HOPE! He said that after the 3rd month most people see steady improvement and finally end up clear..

I can't wait!


On the bright side, I have been on Weight Watchers for about 4 weeks now and I have lost 11 lbs without working out. They have some pretty awesome recipes, and just that has made me feel better about generally hating life with the constant itching and flaking..

I just keep telling myself that it is going to get better.. and it will all be over before I know it..


Photos coming soon..